Today I took Max fishing.
I feel lucky to live so close to the ocean...
to have this time to spend with him.
Still, I sometimes find it hard to relax completely.
First I watch him play, and I feel a little lonely. The water has a way of making me feel so small, and for the first five seconds- I want to feel as the protected, not as the protector.
Five seconds of fear allowed only;)
He is in bliss.
Every one that walks by him smiles, words are exchanged. One family stood with him in silence for a moment.
Be. Here. Now.
I put on my headphones and play the song I play when I need medicine.
I head down the beach. Max follows my lead.
We are communicating through smiles and jestures as the wind and water meet the realm between water and land.
A man walks up to see what we are doing.
We are using a disgusting jelly fish looking tentacle as bait for the hook.
There is much talk about manta rays and gar fish...
Next thing you know, we are getting surfing lessons.
Max is smiling ear to ear as he coasts in on his belly.
I catch him at the crash and we topple and roll in the sand, laughing hysterically.
I look up as our new friend walks toward us.
The setting sun silhouettes his sinewy shape. All I can see is the white of his teeth and all I can feel is his joy...
"I have to go. Max, we have to go. Thank You."
I'm not ready for this. I am opening to love again. Every experience is a step closer...
but I will take it at my own pace.
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